Remember The Time Part II-Or why I can't be angry with Micheal Jackson anymore

Anyone who knows me (or has read the last post) knows how much I really loved Micheal Jackson. I must admit that for years I was really angry with him also. Around the time of the "Bad" album it seemed very clear to me that he was running away from physical "Blackness". Now I believed then and now that all cultures bring their own flavors to the gumbo of humankind. This is a good thing. It is even better when cultures and dare I use the term races come together to share , learn, mix, and groove with each other. I don't believe that one race holds a superior edge in this mix. But watching this transformation in MJ made me ask myself," Does he hate his black features or is this just out of control performance art?"
Some background :
When I was a kid, growing up fatherless, I would read books by Black revolutionaries to help give me some kind of idea of what a committed to his people/family Black man was all about. I would read with fascination their stories of facing down the state, police, and their own less evolved pasts. I fantasized about these big afro -fists in the air brothers being my dad. I would be their righteous son taking their place in the struggle when the state inevitably came down on them. Malcom X's story of growing out his conk in prison was to me the ultimate metaphor for doing whatever it took to get your black mind right. Those stories planted a lifetime seed in me that allowed me to know that you can celebrate you without hating yourself or others. I never found my place with the cultural nationalists-their view wasn't inclusive enough for me. Although I could dig where they were coming from. Reading this you might assumed that I lived through the times that they wrote about. I was only a little boy when these events went down. Most kids my age would call me Little Militant(as sort of a joke)- I mean in the 70's my childhood peers were on a different trip. Just as fatherless as I was, many found pure escapism in pop soul culture to be enough. There was enough of it. The Soul music and culture of the 70's was the bomb.From P Funk to Philly Soul-Soul Train to The Love Train- Ohio Players to the Commodores-the funky seventies were smoking,. Stevie Wonder alone was worth the price of a ticket into a time capsule. Here come the Jackson 5 in this equation. Something for us kids that was just as funky as the stuff that the older people were listening too. Their look alone clearly said here are the children of the 70's dancing our big afroed, leather fringe vests, platform shoes, and unapologetically Black dancing machines into the hearts and minds of all the kids in America. It wasn't stated -it just was. I can't say that most of us kids wanted afo's for revolutionary reasons. We wanted Jermaine's afro and all of the cool things that came with that. Mostly style -certainly not political- The Jackson's were us flavor to the nth degree( meaning black kids). I'm not saying that they just belonged to us-it's just that they were that big in our world that we had no clue that other cultures even dug them. When Off The Wall came out, it was my first understanding that Micheal was world wide. The White , Latino, and Black kids all wanted to rock with you and wouldn't stop until they got enough. How cool was that?!. See now what we've been digging all of this time? Thriller was-World Wide -jam of the planet music! We are the world and the global mission of Live A.ID were beautiful. White, Black , Brown , and all folks coming together for the good of all.
So what happened to this brown man who brought our beauty and soul to the world stage? I know that he stated that he had a skin condition. OK that's cool, but your nose is getting smaller.Your jheri curl is turning into straight up relaxed hair. Are you dissociating yourself from your Afican features? Are we not beautiful enough? Is someone telling you to do this? My nieces and nephews didn't even know him as a brown person anymore. What is the message that it sends them? I understand some of this I think? I mean I actually got a jheri curl once because he had one. No actually I don't. His music was still brilliant and slamming -but I'm more than a little hurt by the rejection. By the time Invincible came out, my 8 year old son didn't believe that he was the same person from my old J5 Christmas album.
That is where I was.

This is where I am now with all of that:

1 Micheal was in a tremendous amount of psychological/emotional pain. I can't speak for how deep those cuts went. Maybe this was a form of self mutilation.

2- MJ gave all to his art-who am I to question his choices? He certaintly lived with more than his fair share of ridicule and criticisim

3- Maybe he thought that he was physically transforming himself into a non racial World Citizen .

4: This brother has probably given to more causes that affect Black and other folk than hundreds of people combined

5- His problems-pain killers and otherwise may have affected his judgment.

6- He never left us. He had too much soul for that.The Apollo Theater celebrations are proof positive that you can come home . The multi- racial mourning shows how much Everyone loved him

- At the end of the day-MJ smashed through all of the barriers of race/culture class -the world mourns him -may he rest in peace-the demons can't get to him anymore

Thank You Soul Brother MJ!